Archive for December, 2010

I love Japan. It’s without a doubt one of the best places in the world. It’s full of crazy neon lights, machines that yell at you, bizarre sacred temples, koi fish, and hot women. Like this one time, I had just left Bar Current and it was like 7am. I was walking along the streets of Shinjuku and this extremely gorgeous woman was walking towards me, smiling, she came straight up to me and asked if I wanted a special musashi. Now, for those in the weightlifting world, you are no doubt familiar with musashi. I, personally, have no idea what musashi is, let alone special musashi, but I do remember seeing it written on a banner behind a weight lifter once during the Olympic games. Anyway, I eventually worked out that what she was offering me was a special massage. You know, nude and stuff? She was like super hot and I should have accepted her offer cos my back was killing me from all the walking I do when I am in Japan but when I found out that she wanted money in exchange for this special massage, I kindly declined, said “kawaii” and went on my way, killing time before I had to rush to the airport to catch an ongoing flight to Germany for some Manowar viking ship burning goodness. So, yeah, Japan… how could you not be into it?

Well, little did I know that beneath the politeness, niceness, and special massages of the Japanese people lies a band as brutal and chaotic as Defiled. Like what the fuck? I couldn’t tell one song from the next but bust this, people who listen to this sorta stuff don’t care and neither should I, really. I mean, it’s just chaos. Like it’s so fast and full of riffs-a-plenty that I can’t make any sense of it. None at all. I had no idea when one song finished and another started. It was all over the shop. Crazy stuff. I’m not even gonna begin to tell you which song was my favourite cos these songs all sounded the same… even more than the songs do on AC/DC’s “Stiff Upper Lip”. Huge call to make but that’s the truth. And of course you should take everything I write with a pinch of salt.

What I can tell you about Defiled though is that they can play like motherfuckers. Shred like crazy, drum faster than that Top Thrill Dragster ride at Cedar Point (which is pretty fuckin’ fast) and can scream at you in death metal growls for extended periods of time; this album clocked in at just under 45 minutes. That’s a lot of time to be subjected to blast beats, thrashin’ riffs and slap bass. Yes, SLAP BASS! Ha! I kept that secret, didn’t I? The bass is, at times, slappy and twangy yet so brutal and they have confusing song titles like “Lethal Agitator”, “Paradoxical Chaos” and my personal favourite, “Behind You Pray” which seems to make as much sense as the subtitles do to those old Jackie Chan movies. Again, you gotta love Japan. Best place ever.

I am not sure what else to say about Defiled only that I am sure that in between episodes of Ultraman, they’re probably listening to Morbid Angel and Cannibal Corpse. Fans of Brutal Truth, Autopsy and Okonomiyaki will dig this. I think I prefer Guitar Wolf. Just sayin’.

Japan is the best. I have a headache.

“In Crisis” hits the streets January 17th, 2011.